Intrauterine Insemination

I wanted more than anything for us to be able to conceive on our own, the traditional way, but that has not worked out for us. So, we made the decision to go ahead with intrauterine insemination. Today was the day. And I have mixed feelings about it.

On one hand, I would do anything to be able to get pregnant. We tried for more than a year before seeing a Reproductive Endocrinologist. After two medicated months with no results, IUI seemed to be the right choice. On the other hand, the thought of not getting pregnant naturally is a little upsetting. Test Tube Timmy…or in our case Turkey Baster Tommy was not in my master life plan. But, a lot of things that have happened to me were never part my plan. I think my certainty in having the procedure was based on this…if I end up pregnant, we will never really know if it was naturally or with a little help. Either way, I will love that child like I have never loved before. In the end I know that it is undeniable that we made the best decision.

Our appointment was at 8:30 am (Indiana time). Since my last early morning appointment, both Matt and I grew a little more intelligent and got a hotel room this time. I love staying in hotels and I thought this for sure would relax me. I was nervous. We were nervous.

Our hotel was a whole 3 minutes from the doctor’s office, so not only did we get to sleep in, but we also got to miss all the early morning traffic that Indianapolis brings. We arrived just in time. I am not sure if it was the anticipation of what was to come or the hotel powdered eggs I ate for breakfast, but nausea overwhelmed me. We waited, and waited, and waited. Finally, just over an hour later (there is a process that is done beforehand that takes some time, but I won’t mention it as I do not want to embarrass my husband) it was my turn.

I won’t go into too much detail, but the process is much like a pap smear; lie on table, feet in stirrups, cold speculum. But for this procedure, a small catheter was inserted into my uterus and the “wash” was injected. It took less than 5 minutes and was not as painful as I had convinced myself it would be. It did indeed feel much like a pap smear, uncomfortable for sure, but not excruciatingly painful. The nurse set a timer and I was instructed to lie there and relax. And that I did. Ten minutes later Matt and I were on our way home with smiles on our faces this time.

And that brings me to now. As I sit here and write this I am still a little crampy and a bit nauseous. The sick feeling is nerves, I know. I am by nature an anxious, inpatient creature. October 7^th (when I test) cannot come soon enough. Please say a prayer for us; not only that we get pregnant, but that if I do not, I will be strong enough to get through the heartache and try again.

Follicle Ultrasound #3

Not that I really needed to mention it, but Round 2 was unsuccessful. After testing everyday since September 2^nd, I started on September 7^th (35 day cycle this time).

On with Round 3. Third time’s a charm…right?!

On cycle day 4 (September 10), I started my 3^rd (and highest) dosage of Clomid at 150mg. Again, I was told a larger dose would increase the number of mature follicles. My first cycle I had 1 mature at 22mm and the second cycle they were all less than 14mm.

Again, with the maximum dose there is a chance of increased side effects. This time though there were no crying spells. My eyes stayed dry. This time I was just plain mean. And hot flashes…oh my! Poor, poor Matt; I apologize, honey.

Today I had my 3^rd follicle ultrasound. Luckily, it fell on a day that I was able to have it done in Terre Haute instead of making the trek to Indianapolis. As overly ready as I was last month, I decided not to be so prepared this time. There is no feeling worse than getting excited about my future as a mother and then being disappointed when things just don’t work out. But, to my surprise, all hope was not lost today. I have six (3 on each side) almost, not quite mature follicles with the largest being 16mm! This is good news. But, I still needed to hear from Dr. Henry’s office before I got my hopes up.

My first cycle (if I remember correctly) the doctor’s office called within the hour with the results and plan of action. This time it was more than 3 hours before I heard from them. Waiting….waiting…waiting; I seem to be doing a lot of that lately. Could it have been that they were waiting for me to call and make payment ($95 for doctor to read the ultrasound and $300 for a possible IUI)? Because I called right at 9am and paid. Or was it just that they were busy and got to me as soon as they could? I like to think the latter of the two. Either way, I did finally hear from them.

The plan: Since my follicles were not quite ready today I am to give myself the Ovidrel injection at 9:30 (Indiana time) on Wednesday (September 21^st) followed by Intrauterine Insemination on Friday (September 23^rd). Wish us luck. Cross your fingers…cross your toes…your eyes…your heart and pray, pray, pray.

There is nothing more in this world that I want than to be a mother. And Matt…he will be an amazing father. I just know it.